The Garden City Refugee

Dear Medical Clinic

October 6, 2023

Dear Medical Clinic:

Thank you so much for your letter.

Since you asked, I am in excellent health. No thanks to the clinic. I remain ever so grateful that I didn’t take the clinic’s advice to take any of those so-called “vaccines” the clinic was zealously pushing. I haven’t forgotten the guilt-trip emails the clinic was sending out to all its patients. Dr. Jones, one of your physicians, even took to mocking free thinkers like me who didn’t follow the sheep. “We will talk later, if you survive,” he said. Well, much to his chagrin, I have survived. And I must say, I’m doing a hell of a lot better than the many people in my circles who did take those injections. A former colleague died suddenly. A relatively young and fit guy I knew died after a very treatable form of cancer metastasized to his brain. A friend of a friend dropped dead later the same day after taking her second shot. And just recently, I learned that a close friend, relatively young, fit and otherwise in good health, was diagnosed with cancer. He readily admits the injections could be the cause. He’s now looking at six months of chemo.

Back to your letter. I’m so sorry to hear that your costs have been going up. It’s a common theme these days. No one is immune, it seems. I suspect the generous kickbacks your clinic has been getting from Pfizer and Moderna would normally have been able to cover any shortfalls. But as the sheep have come to the realization that they’ve been taken for a ride and are increasingly eschewing your masters’ products, those kickbacks are undoubtedly drying up. The golden goose isn’t laying nearly as many eggs. It’s not from a lack of effort. You’re still doing your part to push their products. Just the other day, I got another email from the clinic pushing the new booster. But drug kingpins don’t pay by the hour. They only pay for results. So if your patients aren’t taking their drugs, you don’t get kickbacks. That’s the way it works.

And without those kickbacks, your administrators are really going to be feeling the pinch. Soon, they’re going to have to start feeding their canines and felines real pet food. My heart bleeds more than you can ever know. So I fully understand why you need to pass those additional costs on to your patients. Rover’s teeth must never be sullied with ordinary Milk-Bone biscuits.

But I do so appreciate that you are making the ultimate sacrifice by continuing to accept prescription renewals by fax without any additional charge. All in spite of the incredible administrative burden it places on your staff. And I imagine the kickbacks on garden-variety prescriptions aren’t nearly as generous. Your compassion™ shines through once again, and it’s another reason why I’m so pleased to be a patient of your clinic.

I noted that you mentioned the online patient portal. I must admit I haven’t logged in recently. Your clinic has made every effort to encourage patients to use it. It really looks nice. The designers spent a lot of time and effort to make it user-friendly. But I still can’t even as much as book an appointment with it. Maybe it’s just me. I’m probably doing something wrong. I should try again one of these days. I would sure appreciate not having to spend 10 or 15 minutes on hold to get a gnarly receptionist. But I can understand that staff have other worries besides little old me. Such as expounding on social and political causes such as Truth and Reconciliation Day. It’s heartwarming to know that the clinic is taking its responsibility to the community seriously.

Thank you for the opportunity to sign up for the new plan. It looks like a great deal. But I’m afraid I’ll have to forego the savings and stick with the with the pay-as-you-go plan. Maybe at some later date.

That is, assuming I haven’t found a new family doctor first.

--- Original message ---
From: Medical Clinic
To: Me
Date: Friday, October 6, 2023
Subject: Uninsured Services

Dear Patient,

We hope that this letter finds you and your family in excellent health. We are writing to update you with some important information about the uninsured services (non-OHIP covered services) that you may access through the clinic. While OHIP (Ontario Health Insurance Plan) covers the costs for most of your medical needs, there are many services we provide that are not covered by the Ministry of Health. We cannot bill these services to OHIP, and they often can require significant time and resources to administer. The demand for these uninsured services has increased dramatically in the past several years. Examples of these include, but are not limited to:

• Prescription renewals by fax
• Sick notes
• Referrals for physiotherapy, massage therapy, chiropractic services etc. for insurance coverage
• Insurance forms
• Secure Email Communication via our online patient portal

Unfortunately, costs have been rising over the past several years, in particular the costs to administer secure email communication via our online patient portal. In order for us to continue to provide this service, we now need to charge an annual fee to patients interested in continuing to use the secure email communication via the online patient portal. Please note that if you have not paid for this service that you will no longer be able to use secure email communication until payment has been remitted. You may be able to recoup some of these costs from your private health insurance, if applicable.

Prescription renewals will continue to be done by fax, without charge. Prescription renewals are a large source of administrative burden, and we ask that when you come to the office for an appointment that you know what prescriptions you need refilled in the near future, or if you are requesting medication from the pharmacy to request them all at once.

We will be working with a new program to simplify payments for all of our uninsured services. Patients will receive invoices via email or mail to their home address for any uninsured services used and have the option to make payments online, by telephone, in person at the clinic, or via mail. We will also be offering a plan which will include annual secure email communication via the online patient portal, as well as many other uninsured services. We believe this plan is fairly priced and hope you will seriously consider the benefits for both you and your family. Some more complex forms may not be included in the plan.

If you have any questions about uninsured services or would like to pay over the phone, please call us. Regardless of whether you choose either the new plan or the pay-as-you-go option, please be assured that it will have no bearing upon the medical care you receive from us as your healthcare is our top priority. Thank you for placing your trust in us to provide you with the highest quality healthcare possible, which we hope to fulfill for many more years to come.

Warm Regards,

The physicians of your medical clinic