Generation Gap at the Cabin
June 25, 2023
The Captain’s Cabin in Port Dalhousie is most often filled with chatty old geezers. This visit was no exception.
Seated nearby was a couple of guys. One of them had a paper and was going through last night’s baseball scores. Baltimore apparently won last night. And some team scored 20 runs. 20 runs, he repeated. He went on to talk about how someone was getting $60,000 on welfare. Where’s all the money coming from? he asked.
As they were talking, I glanced over toward the front entrance, where there was a framed license from the city on display. Those who still manage to convince themselves that we live in a free country need only look at the fact that one apparently needs permission from the government to open a business. Then I noticed a rust-colored spot on the ceiling above me. Water damage, I thought. But the skeptic in me thought a rodent may have taken a piss there. Inside a glass case next to me was a display featuring a bunch of British flags. GOD SAVE THE KING was the message on one of them. It should have read GOD SAVE US FROM THE KING.
Back to the guys, they turned their attention to the proposed hovercraft between St. Catharines and Toronto. It was apparently in the news that they got approval for a site here, but they still need a site in Toronto to make it happen. One of them wondered if they would be able to operate the service year-round. The waves get pretty high on Lake Ontario, he said.
Just then, two people whizzed by at high speed on motorized Segways. Every time I see one, I can’t help but think of the late Lindor Reynolds, formerly of the Barry Shenkarow News Mark Chipman News Socialism Illustrated Winnipeg Free Press who once interviewed me for a column. Years earlier, she devoted one of her columns to blasting the Segways for the fall she took in Minneapolis while riding one, as if it was the Segway’s fault and not hers as an inexperienced rider.
Moving on, three young girls walked in, blissfully unaware of the unofficial 65+ age restriction. Each ordered a pastry and a pink lemonade and sat down at a nearby table. I thought about asking them if they were lost. Like, Balzac’s, was just around the corner. But they didn’t let the old geezers who normally frequent the place cramp their style. So I kept my mouth shut.
The one with the red top was easily the most vocal. She began talking about the, like, orientation at Brock. Then she mentioned how Jacob, like, skateboards around campus. She, like, had a business class with him. She went on to talk about how they were, like, at a party. She, like, had a wild time, she said, while grabbing her boobs. But there was a guy she and a friend met who, like, talked too much about his hair. Eventually, they, like, began tuning out everything he had to say. She thought he was just that way because he was, like, studying for exams or something.
Grey Top Girl then told her tablemates that her room has, like, handles everywhere because it’s an accessible room. Which prompted Red Top Girl to say that she decorated her room like a 12-year-old girl. She pulled out her phone and showed pictures of how much stuff she’s got on her wall.
Red Top Girl then began speaking about, like, her first regatta of the year. She was so, like, intense. Then she looked behind her and saw Chris and John, like, making out. It apparently lightened the mood for her.
Alas, it was time for me to leave. But not before listening to some more old geezers out on the patio. Why sit in air-conditioned comfort when you can be outside in the sweltering heat? They began comparing notes about their dogs. One of them said she had a Labradoodle, but she used to have an Airedale. She got that dog at a rescue shelter in New York. They have all kinds of breeds, she said. But sadly, the dog died early. They had to put her down at eight. Putting the dog down was something she regretted. Never again, she said.
Once again, the things people tell you in a coffee shop.
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