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Around Town – Poopaerobics, Free Oranges, Roadside Garbage Dumps and More

December 21, 2020

Highlights and lowlights from a stroll around town:

1. Early this morning, I spotted a woman sitting by a mirror combing her long, shoulder-length hair right in front of her living room window. People do like attention.

2. At Lakeside Park were a couple of guys, one Irish and the other Scottish, walking along the beach talking about their days playing soccer. The things you learn about people.

3. Not far away was a group of women set up behind the carousel doing squats to music as if they were warming up to take a big dump. Poopaerobics?

4. If the shoes fit . . .

5. In the parking lot was a woman making a big production out of sanitizing her hands before taking a big bag of garbage over to the dumpster. A little wrong order of operations perhaps?

5a. Loyal readers may recall the time when I witnessed a guy in the washroom at the Meridian Center putting drops in his eye while standing at the urinal then going over to wash his hands.

6. More of the white stuff. Honestly, I think we get bigger dumpings of salt than snow in this part of the world.

7. Free oranges:

8. For those fluent in Latin . . .

9. Under the “one hand doesn’t know what the other’s doing” file, I couldn’t help but notice these two signs on Lake Street. The one in the foreground directs downtown-bound travelers to the left, while the blue one in the background tells those headed for the core to proceed straight ahead. I know both directions will still take you downtown, but still . . .

9a. Speaking of the core, the city is making a big deal out of free afternoon parking for December, but for I still say they should pay you to park downtown.

10. A concept our tyrannical politicians don’t care to understand . . .

11. Anyone needing a pay phone might want to consider using another one . . .

12. Spotted outside a bank was some dude puffing his guts out, then putting on a mask before going inside. This just in. Cigarettes are much more harmful to your health than a flu virus.

13. On James Street, I was accosted by a community resident bum who first wanted a dollar, then asked if I smoked. No doubt he’s another who moans about not being able to feed himself while spending the money I put in his pocket on smokes.

13a. Speaking of the community residents bums, after having been shooed away from the Central Library Lavatory and finding the accommodations in front of the former Gord’s not to their liking, they’re now congregating across the street in a little courtyard. And with a bit of a nasty disposition, I might add. Another reason they ought to pay you to park downtown.

13b. If you were thinking about checking out the display in the atrium of the Central Library Lavatory, don’t bother. Unless you consider going to see a dressed-up mannequin sitting on top of a white box something worthy of your time.

14. Free toothbrush:

15. Since so many seem to think money just grows on trees, here’s a case of presents growing on trees . . .

16. The Dunkirk Road garbage dump:

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