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Around Town – Coke Addiction, Pizza Wars, Lost Corn and More

September 8, 2020

Highlights and lowlights from a garbage-day stroll around town:

1. I never knew my neighbor down the street had such a hankering for Coors Light.

2. Coke was again the carbonated beverage of choice at the curb. The people at one house were so addicted to Coke that not only was their blue bin full of red cans, they had a clear plastic bag full of cans on top of it that must have been about three or four feet high.

3. I’ve heard of the expression of throwing everything out but the kitchen sink, but this morning, someone really did throw out their kitchen sink with the rest of their garbage.

4. Two families welcomed new high-definition television sets to their households this week. Too bad there’s so little to watch on them these days. Unless you’re one of those who consider state-sponsored propaganda something worth watching.

5. Far be it from me to criticize the proprietor, but you know, this might not be the best time to open a new restaurant. Just saying.

6. Anyone lose a bag of corn?

7. Constipation remains a problem with many as evidenced by the All-Bran boxes I spotted at the curb.

8. Pizza Pizza is retaining its market share, but there were four Domino’s boxes at one house. The people there also broke from another city-wide trend by washing their pizzas down with PC ginger ale. Two full bags of it.

9. There wasn’t too much indulgence in LCBO products, but someone at one house had a real craving for whatever variety of Bud Light comes in pink cans.

10. There are those who think ice cream is one of the four food groups.

11. I prefer “pasterized” honey.

12. Methinks someone is having problems with irresponsible dog owners . . .

13. Speaking of irresponsible dog owners, one guy at the Green Ribbon Trail with a pair of rambunctious dogs let them off the leash right near a muddy bank, then yelled at them for going in the murky water and getting dirty. Serves the guy right. Hope they messed up the inside of his car pretty good.

14. Free latte . . .

15. Quite a bit of damage with this single-vehicle accident near the corner of Lakeshore and Ontario. Distracted driving perhaps? As they post on highways in California, one text or call could end it all.

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