On the Road – Free Clothing, Free Food, Free Rides and More
November 27, 2022
Highlights and lowlights from yesterday’s bus trip to and from Hamilton:
1. Waiting inside the shelter at Fairview Mall was a DWAM carrying a box of Lego that was so large it wouldn’t fit inside her backpack.
2. Figuring that St. Catharines Transit buses are mobile tourist information booths, a young woman stopped a bus and spent several minutes with the driver, who kindly (or unkindly) called someone who could help her. Yes, that is one of my pet peeves.
3. When a Falls-bound regional transit bus pulled up, a guy toting a suitcase was checking the tightness of the nuts on the front wheel while chatting with the driver. I can’t say I’ve ever been tempted to check such things before I board a bus, but to each his own.
4. Whizzing by the stop was an older woman alone in her car wearing a mask. You can’t fix stupid.
4a. One thing that this virus-themed war of aggression our governments have launched against us has revealed is how many stupid people are out there. It reminds me of the line in Rambo III, “God must love crazy people, because He made so many of them.”
5. Also waiting at Fairview Mall was a family whose teenage daughter was lamenting how her Tim Hortons hot chocolate tasted like peppermint.
6. Whereas the other messages were shown in both Canadian and Quebecese, the message on the display of the GO bus stating that masks are welcome was flashed only in Quebecese. Further proof that this mask BS the government is pushing is thankfully losing steam.
7. Waiting for a Falls-bound bus at Beamsville was a DWAM standing outside with a bike. Once again, you can’t fix stupid.
7a. Yes, I respect your right to wear a mask. And I’ve got the right to call you a dipshit. So there.
8. Words of wisdom in the underpass on Centennial Parkway . . .
9. An old guy with a Legion hat boarded the Barton bus with a mask covering his chin. That will surely protect him from any airborne viruses . . . or not. Then again, if he had it over his face, it wouldn’t have made any more of a difference.
10. An older woman was running down the sidewalk to catch the stopped Barton bus I was on and the driver actually waited for her. Once again, this is not the Old Country.
11. A guy who reeked with smoke got off the Barton bus and said “Have a nice day, have fun” to the driver on his way out.
12. Not more than a minute later, some dude sitting in the back unwrapped his smelly hot dog and began eating it.
13. I noted there was an office for the Hamilton & District Injured Workers Group on Barton Street. Given how economically depressed the city is, I didn’t know there were any workers left in Hamilton besides bus drivers, politicians, doctors and Tim Hortons clerks.
14. History was made on this day as it was the first time I had been on a Barton bus when no one boarded with a stroller or a walker.
15. Every single passenger on the Barton bus paid with Presto, except one who paid with the mobile wallet on her phone.
16. Wheeling into the washroom at Jackson Square was a guy in a motorized wheelchair who had two plastic bags tied to the back of it, each filled with cans of Old Milwaukee.
17. Previously unknown to me was that Jackson Square was celebrating its 50th anniversary, and to commemorate the occasion, they were giving away free T-shirts and tote bags, both of which I availed myself of. They were also giving away free donuts, and though I passed on them, I did help myself to a free bottle of water.
18. While waiting in line for the freebies, someone passed by wearing a Chipman hat. As a good friend and loyal reader would say, “Loser!”
19. Near the Main and James entrance was a white board, where people could post sticky notes telling us what they love about Hamilton. Many of them spoke of the diversity, great food and friendly people. A couple mentioned the good walking trails and all the nature around the city.
There were three others, however, which caught my attention. First, the old fallback:
This one was interesting. I can just picture the new Chamber of Commerce slogan. Hamilton: A Great Place to Kill Time. If that doesn’t draw visitors, I don’t know what will.
And then there was this one. Someone loves the “seurity” the city apparently offers. Perhaps I should have pointed it out to the nearby “seurity” guard.
20. On Bay Street near City Hall was a homeless guy with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth asking passing motorists for money. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, if you’ve got money for smokes, you’ve got money for food and shelter.
21. On Locke Street, I was following a woman with pink socks, pink pants, a pink parka and pink hair. Gee, I wonder what her favorite color is.
22. A barber shop on Locke Street was charging $28 + DST for a haircut. For that price, I’ll cut my own hair, what little of it I have left.
23. This isn’t street art, it’s just vandalism . . .
24. That’s fine, but what if I wanted to rent an anti-social bike?
25. Be bold . . .
26. Browsing through an outdoor winter market, I came across a booth where they were selling chocolate salami. I’m not quite sure why anyone would want such a thing.
27. Another vendor was offering whoopie pies. Perhaps they’re best enjoyed while sitting on a whoopie cushion.
28. Quack . . .
29. Good to know . . .
30. Who needs the International Peace Garden that straddles the border between Manitoba and North Dakota when you’ve got the Hamilton Peace Garden?
Even better is that the latter offers free clothing and free food. Can’t ask for more than that.
31. Back in Jackson Square, I spotted a DWAM in the washroom who did his business at the urinal, then walked out without washing his hands.
32. Walking through Jackson Square was a woman wearing a hoodie with the slogan “SOCIAL ILLUSION.”
33. At the lottery counter was a woman wearing a sleeveless top with the slogan “Proud to be a Freak.”
34. In the food court was a place offering a bowl of African soup for $19.99. I wouldn’t touch it if they paid me $19.99.
35. Pig out at the Hamilton Farmers’ Market . . .
36. It pleased me to see the number of vendors in the market who were taking cash only.
37. Video walkthrough of the Hamilton Farmers’ Market:
38. Do you get to sample the “merchantdise”?
39. Hungry pigeons . . .
40. There’s nothing that draws a crowd better than the promise of a free snack and take-out lunch provided by a local church. If it’s free, it’s for me.
41. Despite the +12 temperature, the heat was on full blast in the eastbound B-Line Express bus I was on.
42. When that bus was on stopped at a red light near a Cash Money store, I looked at the ad in the window, which stated the annual interest rate of their loans was 46.93%. The fact that they have any customers at all proves my earlier point about how stupid some people are.
43. Speaking of stupid people, there was a long line of people at the Eastgate Square lottery counter waiting to give the government even more of their money. Yes, some do win. But the vast majority do not.
44. This poison bus parked in the lot at Eastgate Square, much like the one I spotted earlier this year in St. Catharines, wasn’t exactly doing a booming business. Unlike the one in St. Catharines, they didn’t even bother with the hearse, since they must have figured no one was going to show up anyway. It makes you wonder why they’re still bothering with it. Those who have taken the injections aren’t taking any more, and at this point, those who haven’t never will.
45. Available for rent in Eastgate Square were cute plush four-legged animals on wheels, big enough for kids to climb onto and ride around the mall. It’s a fantastic idea and I know I’d have enjoyed it thoroughly at a much younger age.
46. Artwork on the sign for the Confederation GO stop . . .
47. Waiting at the stop was a bunch of adolescents keeping themselves occupied by kicking the pylons surrounding the adjacent construction site. One of those adolescents, by the way, was wearing a rainbow-colored Leafs jersey.
48. Also waiting at the stop was an older woman with a suitcase busy with her phone while clutching her health card. GO buses accept Presto, credit and debit cards, but they don’t take OHIP cards. At least not yet.
49. The Presto machine on the GO bus wasn’t working, so for the third time in recent memory, I got to ride like a Winnipegger. All told, over the past month or so, I’ve saved over $19 with Presto issues and malfunctioning fare boxes.
50. Seated in the front row of the GO bus was a kid who took down his mask so he could pick his nose.
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