Over the past couple of weeks, deeply alarming and unusual events have threatened the very foundation of human existence.
Consider the following:
The Arizona Screaming Weasels, officially known as the Phoenix Coyotes, nee Winnipeg Jets won a playoff series.
Not only did they win a playoff series, they beat someone other than the Calgary Flames.
Never before in their NHL history has this happened.
As if that wasn’t enough, the Weasels won a game in the second round of the playoffs.
Again, it was a history-making event. The NHL Jets never once accomplished this gargantuan feat.
Then they won another game in the second round of the playoffs.
And a third.
These events support only one logical conclusion.
The world is about to end.
Or perhaps not.
But it’s probably a much greater foreshadowing of the pending Armageddon than someone reading tarot cards in the back of a coffee shop.
Winnipeggers thought Armageddon was coming when the Jets left in 1996. Maybe now it is.