11 Apr

Things I’ve Learned from the Liberals

Things I’ve learned from the federal Liberals since they came to power:

i. Paying a tax to Justin Trudeau will save the planet, make life more affordable for me, lessen my risk of getting a heart attack and diabetes and improve my mental health.

ii. Suggesting our borders be defended makes me un-Canadian.

iii. Being alarmed at the prospect of an army of bureaucrats at Statistics Canada combing through my banking transactions, complete with all the personal information a growing identity thief needs, for no other reason than justifying their own jobs makes me “anti-data.” Whatever that is.

iv. I am heartless for suggesting that the Canadian government should be putting the needs of Canadians ahead of people in third-world countries.

v. I should be more understanding when the same government that gives $10 million to a terrorist cries poverty when veterans who have spilled blood in service of their country ask for benefits.

vi. Believing that immigration is a privilege rather than a basic human right makes me a racist and a white supremacist.

vii. Opposing any other form of Liberal policy also makes me a racist and a white supremacist, and as such, my constitutional right of freedom of expression should be forcibly denied. Furthermore, making this opposition to Liberal policy and its leader public makes me subject to being sued.