15 Jul

An Interesting Day on Public Transit

Observations and a few pictures from an interesting day riding public transit to and from Pearson Airport:

1. Walking through the Fairview Mall parking lot at 6:30 am on my way to the GO stop, I spotted a couple of salty looking dudes, one of whom was toting a six-pack. It was either left over from a wild night or they were getting an early start. My guess was the latter.

2. Despite only having a couple of minutes to spare before the bus left, one passenger so desperately hooked on his smokes dug out a cigarette to squeeze in a few last puffs while waiting near the door. That guy needed professional help.

3. One woman on board was wearing knee-high leather boots. Did I mention that we’re sweltering in the middle of a heat wave? ‘Tis more important to be fashionable than to be comfortable, in the opinion of some.

4. At Nash and Barton, a man and his daughter were madly running across the parking lot trying to catch the bus. And the driver waited for them. Once again, this is not the Old Country, where the Winnipeg Transit driver would have taken great pleasure in leaving them in his dust, then bragging about it to his buddies back at the garage.

5. While I was in line at the counter at the Burlington GO station, the woman in front of me was regaling the only agent on duty with a long story about something that happened on the bus. Until the guy behind me yelled, “We’ve got a train to catch!” I felt like applauding.

6. Standing on the platform at Burlington was a heavyweight puffing away on a cigarette and complaining about how her (expletive) asthma is acting up. My heart bleeds.

6a. No doubt this is where our mayor would say I need to be more compassionate. I am compassionate. But don’t expect me to care more about your health than you do.

7. Dear Ms. Sweetness and Light who was our customer service ambassador on the Union-bound Lakeshore West train: The stop after Bronte is Oakville, not Clarkson.

7a. I hope ridding GO trains of the useless customer service ambassadors and replacing them with automated stop readouts and announcements will be among the efficiencies our new premier will find. Heck, even the antiquated STO, a system that makes Winnipeg Transit look radically advanced, has managed to implement such things on some of their buses.

8. Seated across the aisle from me on said LSW train was a woman with three kids in tow, each under the age of 10 and each with a tablet likely better than mine. Why do children under 10 years of age need a tablet?

9. Like, listening to all the chatter around me on the way there and back, I am, like, even more convinced that the most used word in the, like, English language is “like.”

10. At the Clarkson stop, a woman seated in the quad in front of me got up to go to the end of the car and dump something in the garbage, leaving her purse unattended on the seat. And it was still there when she got back. Once again, this is not the Old Country.

11. Leaving the Long Branch stop, someone got on the intercom and said, “OK, here we go again. When the train is approaching, stay well back of the yellow line. It’s not a good idea to be doing exercises on the yellow line.” If only I could have seen what that Darwin Award candidate was up to. But in any event, here’s another case for allowing the law of natural selection to run its course.

12. Spotted on the #2 subway line was someone with a sketch book drawing a portrait. Even on a weekend, there certainly are enough interesting characters to use as subjects.

13. At the end of the car I was in was a lever to pull to stop the train in the event of an emergency. Can you just imagine how often that would lever would be pulled if there was such a thing in Winnipeg?

14. On the packed Airport Rocket bus that took me from the Kipling station to Terminal 1, I was one of two token Caucasians on board. Yet governments continue to justify discriminating against me because of my skin color.

15. This charging station that costs $6.49 to use was right across from a free charging station with multiple plugs. I could only surmise that this was an IQ test.

16. With all the blubber on display at Pearson, airlines should be able to charge for overweight people just like they do for overweight baggage. Same goes for VIA Rail.

16a. Some of that blubber was on a security guard who waddled by. What exactly would he be able to do if there was a problem?

17. Outside near the ALT hotel where the terminal link train ends was this sign directing motorists to a cell phone lot. Is this a place to park your cell phone?

18. Staff at Pearson actually wear a mask in addition to gloves when taking out the garbage, unlike a former workplace of mine where staff dug into trash cans with their bare hands.

19. There were so many disciples of Mohammed at the international arrivals in Terminal 3 that, if I didn’t know better, I would have thought I was in the Riyadh airport instead of Pearson.

20. Walking through the terminal, I spotted a woman in her late 30s with hot pink hair. Grow up. You’re not 18 anymore.

21. Given how Pearson was my landing point after my defection from the SPRM nearly four years ago, it kind of feels like Ellis Island would to those who came across the ocean to start a new life in North America so many years earlier.

22. The low-floor chairs in Terminal 1 were comfortable enough, but awfully difficult to get out of.

23. On the return trip, a noisy family was busy snapping photos of themselves on the subway. I know Niagara Falls is a popular spot for selfies, but the subway?

24. I support bikes being allowed in subway cars, but there should be a designated area to store them safely in the event of a sudden stop. In Buffalo, bikes are required to be in the special wheelchair section and in Minneapolis, there are special racks in every car to stand them up in.

25. Upon my arrival in this part of the world, everything seemed so overwhelming, but today, I move around like a local.

26. On the crowded #1 line was a guy with his feet up on the handicapped seating. He’s lucky someone didn’t decide to just sit down on them. Not that I know of any such experiences personally.

27. Seated across from me in that subway car was a big shot who was bragging about her “special skills.” Like how to paint your toenails a lavender color?

28. Also in the same subway car was someone with a T-shirt with “Quebec Canada” written on it. Well, which is it, Quebec or Canada?

29. Pigeons foraging for food near the McDonald’s in Union Station:

30. Seated across from me on the Burlington-bound LSW train was a 20-something millennial with her newly purchased espresso machine who began munching on a plate of sushi. Then when I pulled out my notepad, she got up and moved to a different car. A snarky writer with pen in hand is indeed dangerous.

31. In addition to the sushi, an older woman was munching on a greenish wrap and a guy in the quad in front of me was trying to shove a loaded six-inch sub down his throat. It was more visual proof that people really don’t care what and how much they eat.

32. Walking through the parking lot at the Oakville stop was a guy with a T-shirt with “This guy needs a beer” printed on it. Methinks he also needs AA.

33. The ride home on the #12 bus was made a lot more pleasant thanks to GO finally deciding to offer the express bus to the Falls which siphoned off much of the riff-raff.

34. The couple seated in the first two rows of the upper level spent much of the ride passing huge homemade muffins back and forth. Each seemed to take a bite or two, then pass them back across the aisle.

35. A luxurious motor home on the QEW had a “Roughing It” sticker on the back. And I suppose they think staying in a five-star hotel is also “roughing it.”