09 May

Ode to a Failed Bike Thief

A bum spots a bike that looks like an easy hit
Despite the onlooking crowd, he doesn’t hesitate a bit

He tries to pry the lock free
But soon realizes this is not a case for ingenuity

He gives the lock a mighty tug hoping it will break
This guy is lower than a snake

Time and again, he pulls with all his might
He finally gives up and disappears from sight

Disgusted, he returns and yanks on it one more time
But all his work didn’t net him a dime

If he put that kind of effort into finding a job
He wouldn’t need to steal and rob

03 May

Classic Bus Story

This morning, I saw a bus pulling out of the Polo Park bus loop. Someone on the sidewalk behind me must have wanted that bus, so he took off in full sprint after it. I got out of his way and watched as he put Jesse Owens to shame while the bus sat and waited at Portage Avenue.

I didn’t think he had much of a chance to catch it, but he completed the 40-yard dash in a time that would make NFL scouts swoon and made it to within spitting distance of the bus.

Then the bus took off.

A knife to the gut that only Winnipeg Transit can deliver.

Been there.

Done that.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Or both.