Recent PostsOn the Road – Washroom Multitasking, Free Wheels, Confused Passengers and More
August 16, 2026
Highlights and lowlights from yesterday’s excursion to and from Pearson Airport:
1. Amazingly, it took only three tries before the ticket machine at Fairview Mall accepted the $20 bill I fed in to load my Presto card. I suppose Metrolinx defines that as “progress.”
2. There’s new messaging on the GO buses about increased fines for fair evasion coming next month. I know most people wouldn’t get it, but instead of fare evasion, they could just call it Winnipegging.
3. Seated nearby were two teenage girls. “We got to Toronto at, like, 4:00,” one of them said. “And the concert started at, like, 8:00.” Later, when talking about the security guard, she said, “He, like, took us to the American Express line.” Yes, people really do talk this way.
4. At Confederation, someone asked the driver of the bus with a big, lighted “DUNDAS & HWY 407 CARPOOL” sign out front if he was going to Niagara.
5. As opposed to illegal basements . . .
6. Inside the Burlington GO station, someone stopped to help an obviously lost black guy. When asked where he was headed, the black guy just flashed something on his phone. How courteous.
7. Call me a skeptic, but I wouldn’t quite trust OLG not to store the personal information on the machine . . .
8. I don’t even want to know how much I paid for this ad campaign to tell me I’m not a train . . .
9. Boarding at Port Credit was a middle-aged DWAM™ toting a suitcase. They’re a dying breed, but they’re still around. And as we crawled into Exhibition, he began spraying himself with smelly bug repellent. The fumes were so bad that I had to move.
10. One of the joggers near the bridge over the Humber River had only one arm.
11. Another DWAM™, this time in the subway, engrossed in her phone:
12. Seated across the aisle was an Asian woman with a rainbow-colored strap for her Apple watch. How welcoming and inclusive of her.
13. Fast asleep at the international arrivals gate in Terminal 3 . . .
14. Spotted in a washroom at Terminal 3 was a guy using both hands to do his business at the urinal while balancing his phone on his shoulder, engrossed in a conversation. Can’t you even put your phone away to take a piss?
15. Behind me on the moving sidewalk between the two terminals, a younger kid said it felt like he was on The Jetsons.
16. The #40 GO bus I caught was delayed for nearly a half hour as the driver and a Metrolinx supervisor desperately tried to get the lift stored away. On these new MCI buses GO is rolling out, for wheelchair-bound passengers, they unlock the compartment and a door at seat level, press a button to bring out the lift and raise the passenger up, where the passenger wheels him or herself directly into a designated spot in the middle of the bus. Even when it works properly, it’s a lot more complicated than what they do on the double-decker buses or regular city buses.
17. Free bicycle wheel at the Dundas & 407 carpool lot:
18. No.
19. Before the #12 GO bus left the Burlington GO station, a confused older woman pushing a walker with a pink stuffed bunny rabbit on it frantically made her way to the door.
“Are you going to the GO station?” she asked.
“Which one?”
“I only know one.”
“This bus is going to Niagara Falls.”
“Niagara Falls GO station?”
“Are you going to Niagara Falls?”
Finally, after getting her to confirm that she was indeed going to Niagara Falls, the driver had her take a seat and took off. Then she began to bellyache. “It’s cold,” she said. “I didn’t bring a sweater.” Realizing she didn’t tap her card, she shouted at the driver, “I don’t know if I swiped or not!” “Doesn’t matter,” he replied. Then she dug out her smartphone and called someone. Even she has one. “I’m on the GO bus,” she said before the connection dropped. “Shit,” she said. “How am I going to reach her? I don’t know her phone number. Shit.” She fumbled about on her phone. “Some days . . . shit.” Then the number came back to her and she called the woman back. “Hi, I’m on the bus. The slow bus. It’s the one that makes all the stops.”
Once done with the call, she dug out a blue sweater from her bag and put it on while mumbling to herself. And as the traffic thickened on the other side of the skyway, she said, “I hope this goes quick . . . These seats are not very comfortable.” Looking at her watch, she said, “It’ll take two hours . . . I need to get there fast . . . Slow as molasses in January.”
She continued doing a slow boil through the stop and go traffic. The older guy who parked himself next to me despite the presence of two empty seats on the other side of the aisle took pity on her and got up to adjust the vent over her head. Then as we left Confederation, he took out a piece of paper from his bag, studied it and asked himself, “What the hell am I doing?” When we were back on the highway, he went up to ask the driver for directions to Queenston and something. “That’s not my stop. You said you wanted to get off in St. Catharines,” the driver responded. “But that’s in Hamilton. You’ll have to get off at the next stop and take the #12 bus back, then take the Hamilton bus.”
Clearly steamed, he sat down next to me once again, muttered some profanity and began tapping his glasses while the woman got back on her phone and called Ed. “It’s going to the bus terminal,” she said. “I think it’s the right one.”
20. At Confederation, an older Indian couple boarded and the guy tapped a card. But there was no money on the card, which the driver explained. “But I thought it was free,” the guy said, probably thinking it would be a free transfer from HSR. “The Hamilton bus is free,” the driver replied. “Not this one.” So the guy dug out a credit card, tapped and took a seat.
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