Recent PostsOn the Road – Boyfriend Woes, Rookie Drivers, Rowdy Children and More
June 14, 2026
Highlights and lowlights from yesterday’s trek to and from Square One:
1. Boarding the #12 GO bus at Fairview Mall was yet another woman who asked the driver if he was going to Burlington. Some of these drivers must want to reach out and slap such people upside the head.
2. After sitting down, I listened to the conversation of a couple of teenage girls who were sitting in the front seats. One of them noted how her friend had just graduated and was, like, looking for a job.
“We’re not, like, in Toronto,” she went on to say. “I’m OK with here to Burlington. But, like, after that, whoosh. I’m, like, that’s where I get worried.” Then she said her mother asked her how she was getting around in Toronto. “It’s not like Toronto isn’t, like, a walkable city. The TTC, like, goes everywhere.”
She then started talking about her friend again and how she got rejected from, like, math class. “She can switch if she, like, wants to go into business,” she said. “There’s, like, a business school in Burlington.”
“When my nose is in the book, don’t, like, text me,” said the girl next to her.
The conversation then turned toward Tyler, her boyfriend. “Tyler is, like, looking toward his future,” she said. “He’s, like, at a firm in Mississauga. He doesn’t, like, mention me as part of his future. We have, like, four years together.”
“You need to start saying things, like, that will make me want to be with you,” she said to him.
As for her own future, she said Brock is, like, starting a law school. “I’m going to have to learn, like, how to make a big decision. I’m, like, turning 21 in less than a month.”
The girl sitting next to her asked if Tyler’s dad was, like, tall. “He’s, like, average,” she replied.
Then they began looking at some pictures on their phones. “I guarantee we could, like, go there,” she said. “It’s, like, so cute,” she said about another picture.
Next came a tale about when she last visited her grandmother. “My grandmother is, like, older,” she said. “She wanted us to stay over. No. We’ll, like, drive home. We’re not going to, like, stay. It’s, like, such a long day with her.” “We just, like, sat in the car for hours,” she said of the need to, like, recover after the visit.
And as we got closer to the Burlington GO stop, where she got off, she talked about her playlist. “I’m, like, feeling spring and summer vibes,” she said.
3. Dear Metrolinx: As if it isn’t bad enough that you’re flooding the airwaves with all those extra announcements, do they have to be played at an ear-splitting volume? I swear, by the time I got off at the Dundas & 407 carpool lot, my ears were sore.
4. This DWAM™ who boarded at Fairview Mall caught the #47W at the Dundas & 407 carpool lot headed for Canada’s Wonderland. With all the viruses floating around, one can only wonder how he’ll be able to stand being among so many people.
5. Dear driver of the #40 GO bus: Congratulations on having just landed that job with Metrolinx. They need good drivers and I’m confident that in the coming years, you’ll develop into one. I’m sure taking out a big bus like that on your own for the first time must have been a big moment for you as well. It was obvious you didn’t want to take any chances as you exercised extreme caution on the trips to and from Square One. I’ll bet you’re relieved they don’t have posted minimum speeds on the 407, because you almost certainly would have been pulled over. And don’t worry about being so far behind schedule. You’ll get the hang of this bus driver thing eventually. Which will no doubt come as a relief to the driver of the car you were tailgating on the 407 on the return trip. Even though you weren’t going that fast, if he had to stop suddenly, your front bumper would have been up his ass in a microsecond.
6. I can’t imagine that this “pride” display at Square One is going over terribly well with the large Muslim population in Mississauga. Whereas we are much more tolerant here in North America, you know what they do to gays in Muslim countries.
7. This looked round to me. But what do I know?
8. At Panera Bread, I had an order of salt with a side of chicken noodle soup. I like going there, but that’s not something I’ll be ordering again.
9. I didn’t spot too many DWAMs™ on the day, but I did notice an older guy wearing a black dipshit mask who pushing a walker. At his side was his daughter, who was wearing a medical-grade N95 dipshit mask. The dipshit family. Soon after, I spotted an Asian woman wearing a beige dipshit mask with a strange look on her face. Maybe she needed another booster, I thought. Later, I was following a guy in a motorized scooter wearing a dipshit mask pulled down below his nose. Pure theater. Just so he can say that he’s “protecting” himself.
10. BMO had ads all over the mall bragging about how they waive service charges for newcomers for two years. And to hell with the rest of us.
11. At the City Center Bus Terminal was a guy in a motorized wheelchair who had a white rag stuffed in his mouth.
12. Whereas the Jehovah’s Witnesses at Fairview Mall were just standing there, their fellow cult members at Square One were aggressively approaching passers-by, handing out brochures and saying, “God loves you.”
13. At the Dundas & 407 carpool lot, I had the displeasure of waiting with three Muslim women in full garb and their respective large broods of rowdy and restless children who had just come in from Pearson. While shaking up a bottle of Pepsi, one of the girls told her mother how much she wanted to go swimming once they got to Niagara Falls. Then the girl seemed so surprised when she opened the bottle and all the Pepsi sprayed out. As this was going on, one of the boys dressed in a bright yellow #7 Ronaldo soccer jersey kept running around and banging on the glass of the shelter. He was hitting it so hard, it was a wonder the glass didn’t crack.
But the story didn’t end there. They all piled on the #12 Niagara-bound GO bus and proceeded to start running around the back. After the bus pulled into the Burlington GO station, before allowing any more passengers on board, a Metrolinx supervisor came up top and asked, “Who’s in charge of the kids? Who’s the parent?” He had to ask several times as the mothers kept giving the Iraqi salute. Finally, he was able to get through to one of them and tell her firmly that the kids had to stay seated and they couldn’t spread their bags out as they needed the seats.
And the kids did stay somewhat under control. Until a few of them came up front and decided to start playing one of the World Cup games on his phone. Qatar was playing Switzerland in San Francisco, apparently. They seemed to know quite a bit about soccer. In addition to the announcer’s loud commentary, they were adding plenty of their own. And in the kind of language that would have made sailors blush. This from nine- to twelve-year-old kids. They’ve obviously had a very good upbringing . . . not.
Whatever the case, I felt so sorry for the guests and the hotel where they were staying in Niagara Falls. I knew this was a story that wasn’t going to have a happy ending.
14. Before boarding at the Dundas & 407 carpool lot, someone asked the driver if he was going to Niagara. See above point regarding slapping people upside the head.
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